Optimistic people are happier, healthier, more successful, and have longer lives. You can be one of them.
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Some people seem to have a sunny disposition, while others always
focus on the darker side of things. Are they just born that way? Yes, to
some degree, says Jason Selk, mental coach and author of Executive Toughness. But it may surprise you to learn that you can mentally train yourself to change your outlook on life toward the more upbeat.
"We're born with a range of potential for optimism or mental
toughness," Selk says. "Human beings are made up of thoughts, feelings
and behaviors, and thoughts control both how we feel and how we behave.
We aren't prisoners of those thoughts. We can choose the way we think,
and in so doing, choose our entire life experience."
Optimists lead better, longer lives. During the 1960s, Martin
Seligman used personality questionnaires to sort Mayo Clinic patients
into optimists and pessimists. When he followed up with those patients
30 years later, the optimists were 19% likelier to still be alive. "If
you're an optimist, you'll live longer than if you were a pessimist,"
Selk says. "And you'll be healthier, happier, and more successful during
those years."
Is that enough to convince you that training yourself for optimism is well worth the effort? If so, here's how to get started:
1. Switch your thinking from problem to solution.
Selk notes that human nature is to focus our attention on problems
and dangers, probably a leftover survival mechanism from our past as
prey for wild animals. So it's important to make a conscious choice to
switch. "Any time you catch yourself focusing on a problem or
self-doubt, ask yourself: 'What is the one thing I can do differently
that could make this situation better?'" Selk advises.
That will get your mind focused on solving problems rather than
worrying about them, and give you more confidence and a better chance at
success. Try to make this switch within 60 seconds of having a
problem-focused thought.
2. Give yourself a mental coach.
"Many of us feel more confident and perform better when someone is
cheering us on," Selk notes. "Yet being a high performer requires that
you watch, evaluate, and are accountable to yourself."
The solution, he says, is to mentally conjure up someone who has
served as an inspiration, mentor, and role model. If you're faced with a
daunting task, ask yourself how this person would advise you, or handle
the challenge himself or herself. "Ask yourself: 'What would so-and-so
do if she had two reports and only 24 hours to complete them both?'"
Selk says.
3. Take 30 seconds each day to visualize success.
"Set an alert on your calendar to remind yourself to replay this
self-image video daily," Selk advises. "This simple mental training
exercise dramatically increases the likelihood you will achieve your
win, and it will improve your mood."
To be most effective, your mental video should be as specific as
possible, with details as to where you are and what you're doing in this
successful future, he adds. "That will elevate a vague life plan into a
true vision that you can use to transform the way you think about
yourself and your future."
4. Give yourself pats on the back.
I actually reach back and physically give myself a pat when I've
accomplished something. You don't have to be that literal but however
you do it, "Develop the habit of recognizing your 'done wells,'" Selk
says.
Don't wait till you've finally finished that huge project or made
that successful presentation. Instead, recognize incremental successes
and accomplishments. "Take a few seconds per day to ask, 'What have I
done well today?'" Selk says. "This simple gesture reinforces optimism
on a daily basis. The answers inevitably add up to help you develop
self-confidence, which is extremely important for high-level
performance."
SOURCE: www.inc.com
